A lady took to mumsnet to moan on behalf of a friend of hers and the forum went crazy. The friend has paid a non refundable deposit for a hen do only to find out she's not invited to the actual wedding! “Is this the most disrespectful bride EVER?”...
Her story was shared on Mumsnet, with many users saying she shouldn't go. Despite being unhappy with the situation, she said her friend was still planning to go, as she has already paid half the money up front - even though she's not actually invited to the wedding, or even the evening do.
Mumsnet users were quick to react, with many saying that the friend should 'cut her losses' and forget about going to the hen do. Others suggested that the only reason the friend had been invited was so that she could act as a 'taxi service'.But some were not particularly sympathetic, describing the friend as a 'walkover'.
One wrote: 'She's an adult. If she thinks it's too expensive she should be more assertive and not go. To go and moan about price is just being a martyr.
Well, this made us think, is this good etiquette? Who “should” be invited to a hen anyway? The truth is, there is no finite rules around who should go, but the hens are usually the brides nearest friends, family and even work colleagues who she wants to help celebrate her “last night of freedom”. Our view is, if they are special enough to be invited to the hen, surely they are special enough to attend the wedding? When planning who to invite, ensure the itinerary is suitable-you might not want your mum and auntie at a weekend away clubbing in Ibiza for example so perhaps ensure you book time in to spend with people who won't be at the main hen do.
In this case, it sounds like the lady was making up numbers and hasn’t been shown much respect by the bride. There are always two sides to every story, and perhaps the lady couldn’t actually go to the wedding. Either way, the hen do doesn’t sound like much fun for her! Our advice-She either has an awkward chat with the Bride to explain her feelings or, she goes and tries to enjoy it. She might even end up with a wedding invite as a result (if she would even want one!). The middle ground of moaning but doing anything about it isn't good for anyone!
We think the reason this made the news is because it's a total breach of an unwritten ettiqute. So if you're planning a hen do, ensure they are on the guest list!